Blog Light-Fewer Calories that the avg. blog

Phantom Mom

December 17th, 2007

One theory of why practicing positive energy sends energy plummeting:   In _The Mom Factor_ by Henry Cloud and John Townsend If you had a Phantom Mom, you have probably developed ways to hide from your needs. “Devaluation” means to minimize the need; “avoidance” means to simply shut down emotionally.

I went to a lot of trouble to adjust to a life where my needs for intimacy probably weren’t going to be met. It involved a lot of shutting down and medicating. But, because it’s my nature, curiosity led me to experiment with increasing my energy. However, anything that opens me up causes me great pain. Finally, it’s easier not to need than to be needy.

Choosing not to live in despair, I’ve lowered my expectations. In another culture, this could be considered very Zen. Something Oprah said, “Do you want to be right, or do you want peace?”

These are things I’ll be examining in my Exploration of positive energy: Do I want it?

Entry Filed under: Positive Energy